John Stape kills Mrs Warboys!

Mrs Warboys - both feet in the grave

It was with a little grim satisfaction that I bore witness to the murder of One Foot in the Grave's Mrs Warboys this week. Victor Meldrew's erstwhile neighbour breathed her last, accompanied by a bowl of Freshco soup, an inhaler plus a rather dodgy photo of her 'son' which was either a thirty year old picture of John Duttine or a doctored snap of John Stape with a stick-on moustache.

However, the episode got me thinking. After disposing of Mrs Warboys, maybe John could also re-visit some other old sitcoms and bump off a selection of supporting characters. How about ...

Nora Batty - John arrives in Holmfirth and mistakenly strangles Nora with her own stockings . . .

"John Stape played havoc with my . . ."

Mrs Slocombe - there's trouble for John when he comes face to face with the blue-rinsed one's pussy and traps it in the lift doors of Grace Brothers . . .

Thelma Ferris - Bob's wife from The Likely Lads comes a cropper when John, slipping out from the bookies for 'five minutes', turns up on Tyneside . . .

Olive - like the back-end of a bus . . .

Olive - more like under the buses than On the Buses as John takes to the wheel of a London routemaster - with devestating consequences.

John's Murderous Adventures in Sitcom Land could just be the ratings winner that ITV1 is looking for. Then again . . .